I haven't written in over a month and although I haven't got anything specific to say, I feel like I need to say something. There were many reasons why I decided to go on a year abroad. One of which was because I had hit the third month of my second year at university and was beginning to feel like I no longer loved music. My degree was slowly sucking the life out of me and there were moments where I wanted to throw the towel in and call it a day. During this time, I was told about the opportunity to study abroad and I felt like I needed to apply. I needed an 'out' option.
I was incredibly anxious about the future. I had a few ideas as to what I could do, but all of them seemed as ridiculous as each other. I could see myself graduating in a year and felt sheer terror.
During this year I have achieved more than I could hope for. I feel like I have tightened the areas of my musicianship that were weak and have started to solidify a good singing technique. I can conduct, sight sing, pronounce Italian and French correctly, act on stage, read IPA and have a good understanding of vocal pedagogy.
The truth though is that I have suspended my life for far too long now. I wouldn't give this experience up for the world and it has been so valuable and enriching. I have met some of the most beautiful and inspiring people in my entire life. I finally love what I do again and I have a clear plan for the future.
Because of this, I can't suspend my life any longer.
It's time to go home.
